Five signs your partner is fantasising about someone else
Worried your partner isn’t as attentive any more? Here are five signs they are fantasising about someone else.
Intimate relationships are complex and dynamic. Feelings between partners can change, yet these feelings often remain unspoken and are not dealt with. For some people, working with a professional matchmaking agency can help them better understand what they truly need in a relationship and how to navigate challenges before issues escalate.
Either partner’s attention may start to wander sexually – not unusual in a long term, intimate relationship. One partner may even start to fantasise about someone else. As emotional intimacy falters, these unvoiced thoughts can harm relationships if left unaddressed. This can harm relationships, so it’s important to know when a partner is indulging in romantic thoughts about another person, and to talk about it openly.
Amy Williams, the CEO and founder of Peachy, is a relationship and sexual intimacy expert. She uses her expertise to reveal the key signs to watch out for in a partner’s behaviour. Amy suggests that finding the courage to talk honestly about these ‘tells’ is vital to maintaining a healthy intimate relationship.
Five signs your partner is fantasising about someone else
The clues to aspirational or actual infidelity tend to make themselves obvious in your partner’s behaviour. It’s a question of knowing what to look for and how to deal with it.
These are Amy’s top signs to watch out for:
- Increased Secrecy on Devices: If your partner suddenly becomes protective of their phone or computer, they could be hiding something.
- Changes in Communication: A decrease in meaningful conversations or an uptick in evasive responses may indicate that emotional connection is shifting.
- Physical Distance: A partner who seems less affectionate or physically present may be withdrawing emotionally, possibly due to fantasies about someone else.
- Lack of Interest in Intimacy: If your partner suddenly shows less interest in sexual intimacy, they could have someone else on their mind.
- Comparisons: Your partner starts mentioning or comparing you to someone else frequently, such as a coworker. That person may be the subject of their fantasies.
These signs can lead to mistrust. Jealousy will likely build, and that can wreck a relationship’s foundations. These ‘tells’ can lead to relational breakdown whether they’re dealt with or not.
Of course, they may not be real ‘tells’; they could just mean your partner has an active imagination and is adventurous, and you are suspicious by nature. Only honest conversation can help to determine the truth, Amy points out.
What can you do if you suspect your partner fancies someone else?
Being open about sexual fantasies is more likely to make things right than avoidance. So talk. Create a judgement-free environment where both partners can discuss their thoughts and feelings.
These conversations can show whether you and your partner are capable of being honest with each other and indeed, whether or not the relationship is durable in the long term. Open dialogue can strengthen trust and rekindle intimacy, too. Maybe the conversation will take things off in a whole new emotional direction, and a new adventure can begin.
Many people feel betrayed when discovering their partner’s fantasies. This can lead to breakdowns in trust and intimacy. But being open and honest can do wonders for intimate relationships. If this is an issue for you, seek out non-judgmental counselling or other impartial, professional help. Your relationship is something to treasure, so lay your cards on the table – and have fun!
